Arsenal Review USA

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Post-ManUre: Scrapfest

September 30th, 2019

We're not exactly sure what a "scrapfest" is in footballing terms, but whatever it is we're sure it accurately describes the spectacle that is two sub-par teams like Arsenal and Manchester United hacking up a football pitch for 90 minutes as they make straightforward tasks like kicking a round ball to a teammate look incredibly difficult. We're of course talking about Arsenal's recent 1-1 draw against their (former) arch-rivals, which unfortunately typified their average performance over a hot-and-cold couple of weeks in the Premiership, the Europa League and the League Cup. We'll discuss when players like Pepe need to finally come good, try to slap some identity into Unai Emery's very dissociative identity disorder-afflicted team, and also take some time to laud Arsenal's younger players...

Post-Watford: Dumb & Ugly

September 17th, 2019

2019/20 Arsenal starts looking more and more like 2018/19 Arsenal as they blow a two goal lead to rock-bottom Watford thanks to some suicidal, whipping boy defense. We'll talk Unai Emery's lack of identity and the worrying observation that this team simply looks uncoached, plus talk about Arsenal's over-reliance on the speed game and....ya' know, all the usual fun things one muses over after a disappointing Arsenal performance.

Post-Liverpool: Two Steps Forward, Three Steps Back

August 24th, 2019

After so much potential shown against Newcastle and then Burnley, Arsenal revert to type against stiffer opposition and drop all three points at Anfield, capitulating to Liverpool 3-1. We'll debate the pros and cons of David Luis (now that we've seen him in action), discuss the setup vs execution debate, and try to evaluate how good Arsenal really can be in the long run when they're still capable of the same defensive lapses...

Post-Newcastle: Here We Go

August 13th, 2019

After a mad but satisfying transfer market dash, Arsenal get off the blocks in the Premier League with an efficient 1-nil road win against Newcastle thanks to an Auba goal and a solid performance by up-and-comers Reiss Nelson and Joe Willock. We'll give our grade to the summer transfer dealings, discuss where this compares to previous summer business, evaluate the long-term inclusion of players like Willock and Nelson based on the Newcastle win, as well as bemoan the rise of football's latest evil overlord, VAR...

Post-Europa Final: A Sad But Fitting Conclusion

June 2nd, 2019

Arsenal appropriately end their 2018/19 campaign with a second half whimper as they eventually concede a four-goal-shellacking to their superior cross-town rivals Chelsea. We'll review the career of Jose Antonio Reyes, who tragically passed over the weekend, before touching on Unai Emery's potential for change, squad rebuilding, and generally making the summer a bit more hopeful than it currently looks here on June 2...

Post-EPL: Could’ve Been Worse, Could’ve Been A Lot Better

May 14th, 2019

Arsenal just manages to squeak out one last win (away from home even!) to finish out their Premiership campaign as they see off Burnley 3-1 at Turf Moor. We’ll take this win with a pinch of salt as we look back on Arsenal’s promising spells throughout the 2018/19 season and give you the best, the worst, the most wankerish, the most sell-worthy, the most indispensable of a very very up-and-down first season* for Unai Emery…

(*Joel wants you to know he’s really sorry for forgetting stuff at random during this production. Just a case of the Mustafi’s…)

Post-Brighton: Out With a Whimper

May 5th, 2019

Arsenal follow up their Europa League comeback win by falling back into their sputtering Premiership form, drawing 1-1 to Brighton at home in another lackluster offensive display. We'll catch up with Arsenal match day commentator Dan Roebuck to chronicle Arsenal's downward trajectory at home, evaluate Aaron Ramsey's 11 year legacy and gauge optimism as the club prepares (we hope) for some major summer restructuring...

Post-Leicester: Beating a Dead Horse

April 29th, 2019

Things go from bad, to worse, to downright pathetic over a three game stretch where Arsenal bank precisely zero points and leak no less than *NINE* goals in very winnable fixtures. We'll discuss to what extent is Emery's managerial style taking a toll on his players, discuss the pedigree of said players and where it all went pear-shaped for Arsenal's top four ambitions...

Post-Everton: Away Woes

April 8th, 2019

Arsenal's away-from-home nerves yield yet another dismal performance as they allow the oldest Premier League goalscorer to dispatch them at Goodison Park. We'll evaluate how big a dent this puts in the Gunner's St. Totteringham's Day hopes plus re-evaluate the amount of poise this squad really has as they lay another away egg...

Post-Man U Live Show: Cometh the Hour

March 13th, 2019

Arsenal strike when the iron is most-definitely hot, beating Man U at home to ensure all their top four rivals drop precious points. We discuss how exactly Arsenal made their own luck, gutsy starting lineups, Maitland-Niles' unorthodox coming of age and how Xhaka can essentially turn any ball into a Jabulani...